I Remember

I remember when I’d never heard the words app., hashtag, or Bluetooth

I remember when eating out didn’t come with a QR code

I remember when a tip with coins was acceptable

I remember when AI was a Geordie accent

I remember when Reform was associated with juvenile delinquents - it still is

I remember when Top Trumps was a card game

I remember when gay was a playground slur, reclaimed, then turned into a series of letters, which then were part of EDI or DEI if you’re in the US, which is now a slur again

I remember when I didn’t shout at the television

I remember when if it wasn’t on a list, I still did it

I remember when my teeth didn’t attract apple skin and pips

I remember when taking a shower wasn’t an event

I remember being surprised when I hadn’t masturbated for a fortnight

I remember when I was first offered a seat on the tube - just last week

I remember when memories weren’t so bloody important.